Did you know that more sticks are killed during the Fourth of July than Valentine's Day, Easter, and Memorial Day combined? Fireworks are dangerous things, kids. Keep that in mind when you light one off next to a forest.
I hung out with Dip Stick yesterday playing video games and watching movies. First we watched Stuck On You and then Lord of the Rings. I'm telling you, I love movies where trees get to talk. Then Ents in Lord of the Rings are awesome, but isn't it a bit cliqueish to expect huge talking trees to be SLOW? They talk slowly, they move slowly, and they think slowly. Talk about stereotyping. And not only that but they use human actors to voice the tree-people. Now that's a slap in the trunk.
And speaking of trunks, Dip
Stick is talking about getting a tattoo on his. "Don't you think that's a bit dangerous?" I asked. "I wouldn't want some amateur to carve his initials in my bark."
"But I don't want initials," he said.
"What do you want?"
"I want, I want...a carving of a chainsaw," he said.
"That's absolutely crazy," I shouted. "Chainsaws cut us down! You're just asking to be made into a table."
You know, I don't think I have much to worry about. Dip Stick's parents aren't going to allow that to ever happen. His mom has a carving of a heart on her, and she usually keeps it covered with moss now.
I hung out with Dip Stick yesterday playing video games and watching movies. First we watched Stuck On You and then Lord of the Rings. I'm telling you, I love movies where trees get to talk. Then Ents in Lord of the Rings are awesome, but isn't it a bit cliqueish to expect huge talking trees to be SLOW? They talk slowly, they move slowly, and they think slowly. Talk about stereotyping. And not only that but they use human actors to voice the tree-people. Now that's a slap in the trunk.
And speaking of trunks, Dip
Stick is talking about getting a tattoo on his. "Don't you think that's a bit dangerous?" I asked. "I wouldn't want some amateur to carve his initials in my bark.""But I don't want initials," he said.
"What do you want?"
"I want, I want...a carving of a chainsaw," he said.
"That's absolutely crazy," I shouted. "Chainsaws cut us down! You're just asking to be made into a table."
You know, I don't think I have much to worry about. Dip Stick's parents aren't going to allow that to ever happen. His mom has a carving of a heart on her, and she usually keeps it covered with moss now.
2 comments:
Sorry I stepped on you when I was in the woods yesterday. I didn't expect you to be there out in the open like that. Roll out of my way next time, will you?
So YOU were the one! Some people.
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